Lunar

Last night was a lunar eclipse. I, admittedly, had no idea. I can barely keep up with who we’re at war with and who Trump has kidnapped, let alone the stage of our moon.

My yoga instructor in class said, “Tonight is a lunar eclipse. I promised myself I would not talk about this, but I really can’t help it. So all I’ll say is take the next couple of breaths to think about something, either in class tonight or in a more broad sense, that you want to let go of.”

Instead of thinking through what I was going to shed, I spent the next couple breaths sitting in my envy of the way she had so confidently spoken on something she was passionate about and tied it into her yoga class. It’s something I’ve been working on with my own yoga teaching - how to seem genuine. What do I have to offer my students that doesn’t make me feel like I’m just preaching from my own high horse? What makes me genuine?

When my roommate, Sarah, and I got home (she had come to class with me), she announced that her lunar shedding was going to be imposter syndrome. Between the two of us, Sarah is not the quick decision-maker. Yet there I was, bedtime approaching, no nearer to what I was going to shed. I am not really one to believe in ‘the greater’, whether that be the stars or the gods, but I do like to follow rules and a part of me wants more to exist. So I really wanted to have my ‘shed’ by the time the day was up.

Alas, 10pm arrived. A ‘shed’ did not. When my alarm woke me up, I discovered that my subconscious, apparently, had decided to not work in overtime. No ‘shed’. As I brushed my teeth, I kind of gave up on it. I hadn’t done it in time, the stars were no longer in my favor.

As I was walking home from the subway, I checked my yoga roster for class on Saturday. Pretty full. Lots of regulars. I started spiraling a bit about what I was going to theme my class around. Maybe I should look up some lunar eclipse themes? Maybe I should go to class tonight and try to borrow a theme from a different teacher?

And that’s when my ‘shed’ hit me - comparison.

I teach my best yoga classes when I pull from a personal anecdote, or a recent theme from a book I’ve read that resonated with me, or I just go off how I’m feeling first thing that morning. For the next [however long the moon dictates], I am going to work on having people that impress me be a source of inspiration as opposed to letting my comparison to their talents and passions be a thief of my own joy.

Namaste, or whatever.